Harris Massacred a Human Twitter Feed in Major Debate Victory

The American People Now Have a Stark Choice: The Future or Doom

The stakes could not have been higher in the first debate between Kamala Harris and Donald Trump. Both candidates appeared unusually nervous at the outset. Harris understood the fate of democracy hinged on her performance. Trump was fighting to stay out of a prison cell.

Harris had a high bar to clear, needing to come across as authoritative and presidential—a test she passed with flying colors. Trump had to show he wasn’t as weird as the Democrats say, and he failed with memorable doozies like, “Now she wants to do transgender operations on illegal aliens that are in prison.”

Next, an unhinged Trump informed us that undocumented immigrants in Ohio were dining on our pets. “In Springfield, they’re eating the dogs, the people that came in, they’re eating the cats. They’re eating the pets of the people that live there.”

David Muir, one of two ABC moderators, had to correct Trump’s lie, reassuring viewers that immigrants weren’t feasting on Fido. “You bring up Springfield, Ohio, and ABC News did reach out to the city manager there,” said Muir. “He told us there had been no credible reports of specific claims of pets being harmed, injured or abused by individuals within the immigrant community.” Trump rebutted that the pet brunch was true because he saw it somewhere on TV. If it’s on TeeVee, it must be accurate.

When the dust settled, a CNN Flash Poll showed that 63% of viewers believed that Harris won the debate.  CNN election data specialist Harry Enten remarked, “Yeah, I’m just going to use a scientific term, and that is that the vice president crushed Donald Trump. All right.”

Even Trump’s super-sycophant Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC) called Trump’s debate performance a “disaster” and said the former president was “unprepared.”  Conservative pundit Bill O’Reilly was also puzzled over Trump’s performance and snarked, “That’s Something SNL Would Do.”

Meanwhile, CNN fact checker Daniel Dale said that Trump, “made at least 33 false claims in the debate, while Harris made at least one.” Considering The Washington Post found that Trump lied 30,573 lies during his four years as president, a mere 33 lies could be considered detox from dissembling.  

Of course, Trump and his MAGA cult suffered his stinging defeat with dignity, grace and humility. Just kidding.

Trump childishly blamed the ABC moderators [Trump actually spoke for 5 more minutes than Harris] for his loss, calling the debate a “rigged deal.” Former FOX anchor Megyn Kelly whined, “Anything Trump said, fact check, fact check, fact check… and their fact checks were full of shit.”  Fox News analyst Mollie Hemingway called for the moderators to be “criminally charged.” Trump conspiracy pusher Laura Loomer suggested that Harris won because she had a hidden earpiece.

Trump, for his part, debased himself by wading into the spin room, after the contest, to engage in damage control. He outlandishly declared he won and seemingly rejected having a second debate because, “If you won the debate, I sort of think maybe I shouldn’t do it. Why should I do another debate?”

Trump’s reaction made him look as scared and weak as Harris said he was during the match.

There was no Mike Tyson moment for Harris -- a memorable one-liner that knocked Trump out. Harris was more reminiscent of Muhammed Ali, floating like a butterfly and stinging like a bee. Over and over, she unmercifully jabbed Trump, as he inexplicably led with his face. Trump knew the punches were coming, but his ego was so large, he couldn’t help stepping into Harris’ numerous traps, once she got under his skin.

Trump’s biggest wounds were self-inflicted. He falsely claimed he did women a “great service” by appointing three Supreme Court judges that overturned Roe v Wade, saying that Americans wanted abortion rights returned to the states. This provided Harris an opening to increase her substantial lead among women by elaborating on an issue that offers a strong advantage for democrats.

“The government, and Donald Trump, certainly should not be telling a woman what to do with her body,” Harris forcefully intoned. Trump could have stanched the bleeding by committing to vetoing a national abortion ban, but instead he equivocated. In that disastrous moment, a waffling Trump looked precisely liked the traditional, dissembling politician that he claims to abhor.

Harris’ performance earned her a major endorsement from pop sensation Taylor Swift, whose 280 million followers could tip the election. Swift took a swipe at Republican Vice-Presidential nominee JD Vance by signing her endorsement, “Childless Cat Lady”.

In response to Swift, billionaire Trump supporter and X owner Elon Musk Tweeted, “Fine Taylor… you win…I will give you a child and guard your cats with my life.”

I’m sure Musk’s flippant, obnoxious Tweet will help Trump narrow the widening gender gap.

Both Musk and Trump are deeply damaged, immature, malignant narcissists who live on social media so they can constantly bask in the adoration of slobbering fans.  They spend so much time online, they have seemingly lost the ability to interact with actual human beings who live on planet earth.

Indeed, Trump’s entire debate performance sounded like a deranged Twitter feed. Unless one has been “red pilled” into the right-wing online fever swamps, it was difficult to decipher many of Trump’s verbal dalliances and diatribes.

One example of Trump ensnared in a right-wing online bubble: After being baited by Harris as weak and unpopular among world leaders, Trump bizarrely turned to Hungarian autocrat Viktor Orban as a character reference. Not a stellar choice if Trump’s goal was to dispel concerns that he wants to be a dictator.  Orban is best known for, wrecking Hungarian civil society, attacking the LGBTQ community, undermining fair elections and neutering his nation’s once-free press.

“Viktor Orban, one of the most respected men,” Trump combatively said. “They call him a strongman, he’s a tough person, smart, Prime Minister of Hungary…he said you need Trump back as president. Viktor Orban said it, he said, ‘the most respected, most feared person is Donald Trump.’”

What’s next, an endorsement from North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un? Trump added to his foreign policy fiasco by stubbornly refusing to say that he wants Ukraine to win.

The one poll number that gives Team Trump hope is the issue of “change”. The most recent New York Times/Siena poll found:

61 percent — of voters say they want the next president to bring a “major change” from Mr. Biden, compared with 34 percent who want “minor change” and 3 percent who don’t want change.  Only 40 percent of likely voters said Ms. Harris represented “change,” while 55 percent said she represented “more of the same.” Mr. Trump, in contrast, was seen as representing “change” by 61 percent of voters, while only 34 percent said he was “more of the same.”

If the debate proved one thing, it’s that Trump is the wrong kind of “change”. He represents change, alright, in the same way that not having a kidney stone on Monday, and then having one on Tuesday, is a change. And like a kidney stone, it is incumbent that voters let MAGA painfully pass through the body politic so America can return to sanity.

The debate offered a crystal-clear choice between the competent, optimistic and eloquent Kamala Harris or the Trump Crazy Train. If the American people choose the latter, the country is officially over. It will take decades for the nation to recover what Trump and his Project 2025 cronies have planned for us.

I’m predicting a Harris victory, because I can’t fathom my fellow countrymen could watch this debate, see Trump’s rambling ridiculousness, and conclude, “that’s the leader we need, and we want his finger on the nuclear button.”

If I’m wrong, God help America.